Apr
19

Hunger Games, cookbooks, genres and movies

“I read a lot – and I read a variety of genres” – Nora Roberts

The young man ahead of me in line at the movies had his nose in one book and was holding another one.

Hunger Games, I asked, fairly certain of his answer.

He grinned and said, “Yes, I am reading Catching Fire (book two in a series of three), but I am almost through with it so I brought along the last book Mockingjay.”

“Ah, can’t wait until you get home, right,” I offered.

And thus began a rather engaging conversation about how we both could become so absorbed in a good book that nothing short of Mega Millions would entice us to stop reading. Perhaps, not even a slapstick, side-splitting movie like The Three Stooges, the one we came to see.

The young man’s sister laughed and explained that he did the same thing with the Harry Potter series.

“So did I,” I admitted, “I read them during dinner and once or twice on trips across Kansas, but I don’t believe I ever read any book during a movie.”

As we laughed about that, it occurred to me that the wildly popular Hunger Games series had a familiar ring to it. Reminds me of a short story I read in high school years ago, I told the young man.

The story I remembered was titled The Lottery, written by Shirley Jackson and first published in 1948. Initially, it was not well received, no doubt because of its shocking subject matter in which the ‘winner’ of a lottery drawing was stoned to death.

Similarly, Hunger Games is about a lottery in which people must die. However, unlike The Lottery, the Hunger Games trilogy was well received and quickly became a runaway blockbuster.

I can see why The Lottery upset folks because it haunted me for days after I read it. By the 1960s, however, it was considered to be a remarkable short story, one that high school English classes studied.

No, he had not heard of it, the young man said: “I pretty much just read young adult science fiction.”

“Well then, you might like that short story”, I suggested and began to tell him the plot.

The head of each family in a fictional small town drew a piece of paper from a black box. If the slip had a black spot on it, that family was selected as the winner of the town lottery. The family members then drew slips of paper among themselves until one slip with a mark on it was drawn. Sadly, the mother in the ‘winning’ family drew the marked slip. Immediately, she was led to the center of town where her children and husband were expected to stone her to death along with the rest of the townspeople.

“That is one shocking story,” the young man said, clearly horrified.

“So what else do you read,” he asked, changing the subject.

“I read from a lot of genres,” I answered. “ Lately, I guess you could say humor, guidebooks and cookbooks are my favorite genre.

“What, they are all one genre,” he asked?

The young man stared blankly at me and nearly became comatose when I related, from memory, the titles of three books I am currently reading and enjoying so much they make me laugh out loud (Authors: Gayden Metcalfe and Charlotte Hays).

Title 1—“Being Dead Is No Excuse, The Official Southern Ladies Guide to Hosting the Perfect Funeral.”

Title 2—“Somebody is going to Die If Lilly Beth Doesn’t Catch That Bouquet: The Official Southern Ladies’ Guide to Hosting the Perfect Wedding.”

Title 3—Some Day You’ll Thank Me For This, The Official Southern Ladies’ Guide to Being a Perfect Mother.”

The young man’s nose went right back into the Hunger Games book when I told him about the recipe for the perfect egg salad sandwich that I found in the some-day-you’ll-thank-me book.

I think we might have a generational gap here, although we both loved The Three Stooges movie, and I have no idea what to make of that.

Apr
13

Could April be the cruelest month?

“April is the cruelest month” – T.S. Elliott

Admit it, don’t we usually think lovely thoughts about the month of April? We don’t think of it as cruel at all. We think about the advent of spring, sunshine, flowers, the opening day of baseball season and the end of the school year finally in sight.

Yes indeed, all good thoughts about the month of April.

But not so fast, I guess I don’t think that way. Here is what I mean.

Yesterday, as I was leaving Wal-Mart with both arms loaded with jugs of weed killer, so much that I had trouble carrying them, I walked with a spring in my step. I was actually giddy at the fact that I was about to tackle April weeds and could not wait to get on with the task.

True I was excited, but it was not about the glories of April, it was about destroying, no annihilating April weeds, those cruel, remorseless, persistent, mean and nasty wild noxious things that pop up everywhere this time of year. Believe me, they can inflict pain and anguish and bring about great suffering for gardeners.

Once, I was so distressed about spring weeds that I wrote an entire column on the horrors of Creeping Jenny, thistles and trumpet vines. What can I say, I live in the country, and we know about these things.

All right, I realize I might hear from weed lovers and that there could possibly be a Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Weeds out there somewhere in the world, but please don’t write me about that.

By now you may be wondering how I got started on this rant?

I was reading the April issue of Successful Farming when I saw the headline “War on Weeds” in a screaming bold all caps font. Naturally, I flipped right to the story and read with great interest every idea they put forth about killing weeds (I am always looking for a new way to whip them into submission).

Not far from that article was another one just as interesting. Cheryl Tevis, farm issues editor, wrote quite the convincing piece about how April is the cruelest month in her opinion. She explained how April weather teases us and asked her readers, “How many times have you felt the stirrings of spring, only to be yanked back into the throes of winter?”

She bemoaned the ritual of spring housecleaning that arrives in April along with the rainy, mud season that afflicts many locales. Tevis also lamented the fact that the asparagus isn’t ready yet in April, nor are strawberries or rhubarb, with which I totally agree.

So there you have it, Tevis’s reasons and mine for why April could be indeed the cruelest month of the year, although for me, the invasion of April weeds trumps them all.

When I finished writing this article, I looked out my window only to discover unhappily that I missed quite a lot of chickweed, and oh no, Creeping Charlie and a large patch of clover, both of which will choke out the grass and take over my flower garden.

Cruel April, this is war! Somehow, I don’t think I am winning.

Apr
05

Anything can happen at the post office

“What a wonderful thing is the mail”?– Author Unknown

I like picking up our mail at a post office box instead of home delivery.

It’s a wonderful thing, actually, and picking up our mail gives me a chance to go to the post office first thing every morning where absolutely anything can happen.

You might think that I missed my morning coffee when I tell you that the post office, at least in our little town, is a friendly place. I realize that elsewhere this may not be a commonly held opinion, but I truly enjoy going to ours.

The other day, for instance at the post office, I encountered a delightful conversation that turned effervescent and animated when my friend Linda and I stood in the lobby and chatted excitedly. I don’t see her much anymore, but when I do, it seems to happen at the post office.

Another thing about our post office that I find interesting, especially this time of year, is that it is a noisy place. Boxes and boxes of little chicks are waiting to be claimed and taken to nearby farms, where I presume the chicks will one day lay dozens of eggs. In the meantime, these chicks chirp a lot.

I should introduce you to my postmaster friend while I’m at it. His name is Jim, and he is an outgoing, engaging sort and knows without asking where I will likely mail my packages, which I do often. He might ask me, “So how is your son in 85042 doing? Does he miss the whirlwind life of 20036?”

Last year our postmaster asked me this question, “Has your other son gone back to school yet, the one up there in that 46383 lake effect country? Wonder if they will have another bad winter?”

And when I mail a package to the son who lives the closest to home, Jim might say, “Bet you’re glad to have one son live so close by, the one in the 64111 neighborhood. How does he like it up there?”

I guess I had better tell him that the son in 46383 moved to 64111, and the 64111 son moved to 66205, but knowing Jim, he will figure that out soon enough.

There is a clerk at the front counter who is one of the cheeriest people I ever met. She smiles, laughs, and greets me like an old friend. No wonder I enjoy going there.

Sometimes while waiting in line, I cannot help staring at her long hair, braided expertly into one long rope that travels down the full length of her back. Her beautiful hair reminds me of my Great-Aunt Bess, who wore her hair much the same way. I mentally speculate about this nearly every time I see her and wonder how can she possibly braid that long head of hair by herself? It gives me something to do while I wait.

Occasionally, I see the ‘iris lady’ at the post office. She ships packages of iris roots ‘by the boatload’ that she sells online. I find myself wondering, as I stand behind her, how much time does that take to address, label and seal all those boxes. And who are all these people buying iris roots, anyway? I like irises and applaud her entrepreneurship, but she ships a serious amount of roots.

I try to pick up our mail when the counter opens so as to see the “8:30iers”. I call them that because the folks are always there at 8:30 a.m. sharp, the moment the window opens and mail is put out in the post office boxes. It is fun saying hello to them and receiving their good wishes almost every morning. Wouldn’t want to miss it.

Thus day after day, I continue to marvel at the sights and sounds of our local post office.

OK, I know what you are thinking by now, “Why don’t you have your mail delivered and save yourself a lot of time dawdling around the post office?”

And miss something? I don’t think so, and besides, anything can happen at the post office.

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